We had our pregnancy test on New Years Eve. We had tested at home so we were prepared for a negative result. We got the call around noon. This time the home pregnancy tests actually helped because we didn't have to deal with such a drastic blow; we had time to adjust. We have decided to take a few months off and try again in eight months with a different fertility clinic. We have made connections with the clinic and were really impressed with our first appointment. The reason we did not switch is that it is very difficult to get your frozen embryos moved and the survival rate from thawing can be an issue when you have the embryos transferred as different clinics have different procedures. In addition, this clinic does not perform reciprocal ivfs yet; they have to get their legal ducks in a row.
With all that we have been through and the diagnoses that we have received, we believe the best course of action will be to proceed with IUI. Here's to hoping 2013 will bring exciting news!
Sunday, January 27, 2013
Sunday, December 23, 2012
FET 12/21/12
12/21/12
6:45am--wake up to learn that the world did not end while we were sleeping-bonus.
7:30am--Leslie's pre-transfer acupuncture appointment. The acupuncturist is fantastic and was willing to come in early since we have an early transfer this morning.
9:00am--We arrive early at the fertility clinic early for our 9:30am start appointment. Leslie claims she really has to pee. Since it took additional time to fill her bladder last night, she is given more water and her valium. The fertility doctor comes in to confirm we are thawing three embryos.
10:00am--The fertility doctor comes in to tell us that one of the eggs did not survive the thaw. It is a amazing the loss you feel when you learn your embryo did not make it. But we are excited for the transfer. We wheel Leslie into the procedure room and they use the ultrasound machine to confirm she has a full bladder. It was TOO FULL! So they called the doctor in right away to use a catheter to relieve the bladder so they could actually see the uterus. Poor Leslie, turns out she was right, she did have a full bladder :). The second doctor came in for the transfer and we confirmed the lining looked great, etc.
11:00am--lunch at Chili's---chicken enchilada soup and buffalo bites. Lemon water with no ice.
12:00pm--our doctor does not recommend bed rest. Rather, she recommends moving around to keep the blood flowing but no exercise the first day. So we walk through best buy and the book store.
2:00pm--Leslie's follow up acupuncture appointment. She has formed a few bruises where she had the needles--maybe because of the low dose aspirin?
5:00pm--we meet at home, finish packing for our Christmas travel to Pennsylvania. On the road by 5:45pm. we decide to take it easy on the ride and stop every three hours so that Leslie can walk around and stretch her legs as needed. We arrive in Pennslyvania at 7:30am CST (8:30 EST).
Now the two week weight begins. Our beta test is scheduled for New Years Eve :).
6:45am--wake up to learn that the world did not end while we were sleeping-bonus.
7:30am--Leslie's pre-transfer acupuncture appointment. The acupuncturist is fantastic and was willing to come in early since we have an early transfer this morning.
9:00am--We arrive early at the fertility clinic early for our 9:30am start appointment. Leslie claims she really has to pee. Since it took additional time to fill her bladder last night, she is given more water and her valium. The fertility doctor comes in to confirm we are thawing three embryos.
10:00am--The fertility doctor comes in to tell us that one of the eggs did not survive the thaw. It is a amazing the loss you feel when you learn your embryo did not make it. But we are excited for the transfer. We wheel Leslie into the procedure room and they use the ultrasound machine to confirm she has a full bladder. It was TOO FULL! So they called the doctor in right away to use a catheter to relieve the bladder so they could actually see the uterus. Poor Leslie, turns out she was right, she did have a full bladder :). The second doctor came in for the transfer and we confirmed the lining looked great, etc.
11:00am--lunch at Chili's---chicken enchilada soup and buffalo bites. Lemon water with no ice.
12:00pm--our doctor does not recommend bed rest. Rather, she recommends moving around to keep the blood flowing but no exercise the first day. So we walk through best buy and the book store.
2:00pm--Leslie's follow up acupuncture appointment. She has formed a few bruises where she had the needles--maybe because of the low dose aspirin?
5:00pm--we meet at home, finish packing for our Christmas travel to Pennsylvania. On the road by 5:45pm. we decide to take it easy on the ride and stop every three hours so that Leslie can walk around and stretch her legs as needed. We arrive in Pennslyvania at 7:30am CST (8:30 EST).
Now the two week weight begins. Our beta test is scheduled for New Years Eve :).
Sunday, December 16, 2012
Leslie's first lining check
Leslie was due for her period the second or third week in November. She has PCOS so it sometimes varies. The instructions were to call and schedule an appointment for Day 2 of her period. So we waited....and waited. By the first week of December, we were antsy. We called our fertility doctor and they put her on a medication to start her period (she has had to take this medication a couple of times in the past). By day two of the medication, Leslie had her period. We scheduled our Day 2 appointment for Sunday, December 9th. I explained to Leslie what to expect in this appointment---the full bladder appointment. She drank water before bed and did not pee right away in the morning when she woke up. I asked her---do you have to go, I mean REALLY have to go? Her response-well, I have to pee. My response---no, I mean do you have to go so bad that if you sneeze right now we will have problems? Her response--well no. Answer-you better start chugging the water. We arrived at the doctor appointment with 32 ounces of water post-bedtime in Leslie and we were still getting the same response. So the nurse used the ultrasound and Leslie wasn't quite ready for the baseline visit/trial transfer. So we she had to drink another 32 ounces and let gravity do it's thing. Finally-she was at the breakpoint and we were ready. They did the catheter procedure to draw attention to the lining and scheduled her first lining check for Sunday, December 16th. She also was to start Estrogen today and luckily, she only has to take the pills-no vivelle patches (note the pills are only $10 with our co-pay while the patches were a couple hundred a pack; so Cheap Leslie was a happy camper).
We set Leslie's phone alarm to ring four times a day so she could remember to take her pill at work. In addition, she really up'd her water intake. We also scheduled her first acupuncture appointment for Friday 12/14. The statistics are that acupuncture helps the day of transfer so we were going to keep it up. But we only scheduled the one appointment before the transfer day.
On Sunday, December 16th we headed in for our first lining check. The nurse practitioner was covering today which was alright with us as she was always more gentle with the probing. She also started the appointment by emphasizing what were looking for: 7mm and triple layer. She went in and the words out of her mouth: "wow, this is textbook." Leslie had the triple layer, 9.6mm, and it continued throughout the uterus so we had a great smiley face on the ultrasound. I had to stop shaking Leslie out of excitement so she could snap the photos (she printed a copy of the smiley face for us---it's on our fridge; yeah, some people might find that weird :) ). I was SOOOOO EXCITED. Leslie was certainly excited as well but you could tell the nerves were setting in. We had to walk through the protocol again for her, we painted my targets on her back for the progesterone and by the time we left she was on the same cloud that I was on. Our transfer day is 12/21/12.
Song----It's the end of the world as we know it.....
The beginning of our new life begins on 12/21/12!
We set Leslie's phone alarm to ring four times a day so she could remember to take her pill at work. In addition, she really up'd her water intake. We also scheduled her first acupuncture appointment for Friday 12/14. The statistics are that acupuncture helps the day of transfer so we were going to keep it up. But we only scheduled the one appointment before the transfer day.
On Sunday, December 16th we headed in for our first lining check. The nurse practitioner was covering today which was alright with us as she was always more gentle with the probing. She also started the appointment by emphasizing what were looking for: 7mm and triple layer. She went in and the words out of her mouth: "wow, this is textbook." Leslie had the triple layer, 9.6mm, and it continued throughout the uterus so we had a great smiley face on the ultrasound. I had to stop shaking Leslie out of excitement so she could snap the photos (she printed a copy of the smiley face for us---it's on our fridge; yeah, some people might find that weird :) ). I was SOOOOO EXCITED. Leslie was certainly excited as well but you could tell the nerves were setting in. We had to walk through the protocol again for her, we painted my targets on her back for the progesterone and by the time we left she was on the same cloud that I was on. Our transfer day is 12/21/12.
Song----It's the end of the world as we know it.....
The beginning of our new life begins on 12/21/12!
The Switch
So we had our follow-up visit with our fertility doctor on 11/21 (the Sunday before Thanksgiving). We were really nervous going into the appointment given the last appointment results but were determined that if we were told our lining was not there, we were not going to move forward with this cycle. Even though we may have thought we were prepared for whatever the doctor said, it is always a blow when you hear the "I'm sorry...." Not only did I not have the depth, but I still did not have the triple layer and it looked as though there was was fluid floating in my uterus. Just a straight up mess in there. So of course I cried (clearly the estrogen was floating around in my head as opposed to growing a uterine lining so there was no way I was going to be able to hold back the tears to have a calm, cool, conversation with the doctor). The doctor suggested two options: 1) switch to Leslie's uterus or 2) attempt a natural cycle.
For those of you who are unfamiliar with a natural cycle, your doctor monitors your natural ovulation and counts on your own body and ovulation to produce the estrogen you need to grow your lining. You have somewhat fewer med costs, but you substitute that with more blood draws and more ultrasounds/appointments with the doctor. I read a post on a blog where the person thought it was a more economical route but I have to disagree as my meds are substantially cheaper than these doctor visits. Plus it would mean I would have to be at the doctors office more frequently and that seems to cause stress.
We contacted another fertility doctor to show my hysteroscopy results and to get a second opinion regarding the results: calcified fibroids. He also had never seen such a case and had the suggestion that I try Lupron to address the fibroids (been there done that :)) but acknowledged that this wouldn't do anything to address the calcification.
So we went on a long walk through the nature preserve in our back yard and weighed our options. As we were walking back to our condo, we were set; we were going to pursue the natural cycle. Give it one more shot and hope that the receiver is open for that hail mary. We emailed our doctor that night at approx 8pm that we wanted to schedule a telephone call the next day to identify what our next steps would be.
As we were lying in bed that night (approx 10pm) I turned to Leslie and said, I really think we should switch. Leslie was apprehensive in her response (is she testing me? does she know what she is saying? am I ready for this?) as this was a very emotional issue for me. It was our goal to create a child together and we had identified what was important to each of us: Leslie wanted a biological child and I wanted to carry. What would mean if we made the switch? To say that this process was emotionally/mentally draining for me would be an understatement. I was clearly depressed in this process----after all, I had been going through this process for 9 months: no drinking, no caffeine, stopped taking all medication including the antidepressants and sleep medication I had been taking for ten years, pumped full of hormones and 25 pounds added and no baby. I honestly do not know if I could take another negative. Plus, the doctor had gone through Leslie's ultrasound photos from the retrievals and she was looking great. I had to accept that fact that not-carrying the child is not going to make me any less of a parent. We are still going through this process together.
When I called the doctor the next day, I corrected my late night email and explained that we were going to make the switch. The doctor emphasized that she thought this was the path that would be most likely to produce a positive result for us because quite frankly she had never seen the fibroid issue that I have and had no clue how to address it. She ended the call by explaining her biggest issue that she had to overcome when she was struggling with infertility herself; she had to let go of the fact she would never deliver a child. I couldn't help but chime in---uggh, I was certainly NOT looking forward to delivery. Carrying yes, breast feeding yes, delivery---uh, no we could have skipped that step all together.
As I am writing this, I am officially clean of the meds and feel I have regained my sanity. I think I hit clarity around the first week of December. I have also hit the gym and started dieting and am ten pounds down. Although it was a tough decision and a blow at the time, I am super excited to continue our journey. Yes, my role in this pregnancy will change. But when I close my eyes and visualize the path before us, I am so excited and confident that my Leslie will bring our baby(ies) into this world. As the I hit the fast forward in my visual timeline of our pregnancy, I see the feet rubbing, the late-night craving runs, the cocoa butter baths, the coaching her through the deliver and I am just so excited to excel in my role as best supporting actress for my leading lady.
For those of you who are unfamiliar with a natural cycle, your doctor monitors your natural ovulation and counts on your own body and ovulation to produce the estrogen you need to grow your lining. You have somewhat fewer med costs, but you substitute that with more blood draws and more ultrasounds/appointments with the doctor. I read a post on a blog where the person thought it was a more economical route but I have to disagree as my meds are substantially cheaper than these doctor visits. Plus it would mean I would have to be at the doctors office more frequently and that seems to cause stress.
We contacted another fertility doctor to show my hysteroscopy results and to get a second opinion regarding the results: calcified fibroids. He also had never seen such a case and had the suggestion that I try Lupron to address the fibroids (been there done that :)) but acknowledged that this wouldn't do anything to address the calcification.
So we went on a long walk through the nature preserve in our back yard and weighed our options. As we were walking back to our condo, we were set; we were going to pursue the natural cycle. Give it one more shot and hope that the receiver is open for that hail mary. We emailed our doctor that night at approx 8pm that we wanted to schedule a telephone call the next day to identify what our next steps would be.
As we were lying in bed that night (approx 10pm) I turned to Leslie and said, I really think we should switch. Leslie was apprehensive in her response (is she testing me? does she know what she is saying? am I ready for this?) as this was a very emotional issue for me. It was our goal to create a child together and we had identified what was important to each of us: Leslie wanted a biological child and I wanted to carry. What would mean if we made the switch? To say that this process was emotionally/mentally draining for me would be an understatement. I was clearly depressed in this process----after all, I had been going through this process for 9 months: no drinking, no caffeine, stopped taking all medication including the antidepressants and sleep medication I had been taking for ten years, pumped full of hormones and 25 pounds added and no baby. I honestly do not know if I could take another negative. Plus, the doctor had gone through Leslie's ultrasound photos from the retrievals and she was looking great. I had to accept that fact that not-carrying the child is not going to make me any less of a parent. We are still going through this process together.
When I called the doctor the next day, I corrected my late night email and explained that we were going to make the switch. The doctor emphasized that she thought this was the path that would be most likely to produce a positive result for us because quite frankly she had never seen the fibroid issue that I have and had no clue how to address it. She ended the call by explaining her biggest issue that she had to overcome when she was struggling with infertility herself; she had to let go of the fact she would never deliver a child. I couldn't help but chime in---uggh, I was certainly NOT looking forward to delivery. Carrying yes, breast feeding yes, delivery---uh, no we could have skipped that step all together.
As I am writing this, I am officially clean of the meds and feel I have regained my sanity. I think I hit clarity around the first week of December. I have also hit the gym and started dieting and am ten pounds down. Although it was a tough decision and a blow at the time, I am super excited to continue our journey. Yes, my role in this pregnancy will change. But when I close my eyes and visualize the path before us, I am so excited and confident that my Leslie will bring our baby(ies) into this world. As the I hit the fast forward in my visual timeline of our pregnancy, I see the feet rubbing, the late-night craving runs, the cocoa butter baths, the coaching her through the deliver and I am just so excited to excel in my role as best supporting actress for my leading lady.
Sunday, November 11, 2012
Round 3
We had our baseline visit on Friday, November 2nd. This is the appointment where you have to have the full bladder. I am not coherent in the mornings when I wake up so I went to the restroom right away. Then I had the oh crap moment when I remembered a 1/2 hour before my appointment that I needed to have a full bladder. So I filled my water bottle three times (16 oz), chugged my low sodium V8 and I still had a walnut size bladder at the time of my appointment. So my appointment took much longer as expected. I was in the room drinking soda which is supposed to fill your bladder more quickly than just water which was actually difficult to down since I do not normally drink soda. Then I had a scare when I sneezed---uggh thought I was going to have to start all over again!
The appointment went well and my doctor put me back on the usual-four estrogen pills per day and two vivelle patches that I change every three days. We scheduled my lining test for the 11th and expected transfer on the 16th.
In the meantime, I had another acupuncture session. My liver was showing sensitivity so my acupuncturist emphasized the need to eat foods/drinks that will help my liver so that it can absorb the meds I am taking.
I had my baseline visit on the 11th and I took another hit. The lining does not have the structure or the depth. Even when my lining was "bad" in terms of thickness (of course we learned this after the fact) during the first round, I still had the triple layer structure. This time I did not even have that. The doctor is recommending that I continue the estrogen regimen for another 7 days and scheduled another ultrasound for next Sunday. I am feeling very discouraged. I was concerned that I may be building on a poor foundation at this point so I have emails out to our regular doctor to make sure that we are making the right decision by continuing with this cycle.
Ended the night with one of my best friends coming over to comfort us. Never underestimate the value of a great support network!
The appointment went well and my doctor put me back on the usual-four estrogen pills per day and two vivelle patches that I change every three days. We scheduled my lining test for the 11th and expected transfer on the 16th.
In the meantime, I had another acupuncture session. My liver was showing sensitivity so my acupuncturist emphasized the need to eat foods/drinks that will help my liver so that it can absorb the meds I am taking.
I had my baseline visit on the 11th and I took another hit. The lining does not have the structure or the depth. Even when my lining was "bad" in terms of thickness (of course we learned this after the fact) during the first round, I still had the triple layer structure. This time I did not even have that. The doctor is recommending that I continue the estrogen regimen for another 7 days and scheduled another ultrasound for next Sunday. I am feeling very discouraged. I was concerned that I may be building on a poor foundation at this point so I have emails out to our regular doctor to make sure that we are making the right decision by continuing with this cycle.
Ended the night with one of my best friends coming over to comfort us. Never underestimate the value of a great support network!
Monday, October 22, 2012
Preparing for Round 3
We had the hysteroscopy and the doctor found some calcification within my uterus. According to Leslie, she was able to remove as much as she could. She performed a biopsy as well and what she thought was inflammation turned out to be muscle. Nonetheless, I am on a antibiotic for 30 days. I am also taking a probiotic to balance out.
I had an acupuncture appointment last week and I feel re-energized. I will continue acupuncture weekly through the next cycle.
My doctor had a last minute test she wanted me to obtain-a prolactin test. In order to provide the sample for the test I was not to have any breast stimulation. Leslie was out of town so I thought it wouldn't be a problem. But it turns out I tend to touch my own breasts while on the phone-weird. So I had a friend come over as I clearly knew I would not do this with company present. So the next morning I was ready for this last minute test. It turns out my prolactin levels were high so I am also on a medication to lower my prolactin test. I was reading online (I know, I told myself I wasn't going to do this) and found that high prolactin levels can impact implantation.
With that said, the plan is that we will start again at the end of this month. I am to make an appointment with my doctor on day two of my next period. In addition to making sure she does not note calcification during my ultrasounds, my doctor is also adding prednisone to this cycle as well.
Fingers crossed. Feeling positive. Leslie and I have come to believe that perhaps we were just meant to have girls :).
I had an acupuncture appointment last week and I feel re-energized. I will continue acupuncture weekly through the next cycle.
My doctor had a last minute test she wanted me to obtain-a prolactin test. In order to provide the sample for the test I was not to have any breast stimulation. Leslie was out of town so I thought it wouldn't be a problem. But it turns out I tend to touch my own breasts while on the phone-weird. So I had a friend come over as I clearly knew I would not do this with company present. So the next morning I was ready for this last minute test. It turns out my prolactin levels were high so I am also on a medication to lower my prolactin test. I was reading online (I know, I told myself I wasn't going to do this) and found that high prolactin levels can impact implantation.
With that said, the plan is that we will start again at the end of this month. I am to make an appointment with my doctor on day two of my next period. In addition to making sure she does not note calcification during my ultrasounds, my doctor is also adding prednisone to this cycle as well.
Fingers crossed. Feeling positive. Leslie and I have come to believe that perhaps we were just meant to have girls :).
Monday, September 24, 2012
Still positive
So that brings us to today. We had our appointment with another fertility doctor who reviewed our file and believed there was no good reason that were weren't pregnant yet given our age and health. He questioned the implantation or handling of the eggs as his practice is "more advanced" than the other clinic. Unfortunately however, they cannot accept Leslie's eggs at their clinic as they do not have the legal clear to transfer third party eggs and even if they did, they use different freezing and thawing practices than the other clinic which could mean that our last three eggs would not make it through the process.
We have three frozen girl embryos. Two A+ and one A. I met with our fertility doctor regarding her plan should we proceed with a second frozen embryo transfer. She wants to perform a hysteroscopy which under her protocol requires an overnight hospital stay. A hysteroscopy is the process of using a viewing scope to examine the interior of the uterus along with the cervical canal. The scope is inserted through the vagina and into the cervical opening--I will be out during this process. She wants to see if I have any scar tissue issues and also wants to biopsy some of the lining. This test has to occur between days 5 and 12 of my next period. She wanted me to go on birth control pills. I hesitated and she withdrew that requirement immediately. So we have my pre-op appointment tomorrow. Hopefully Aunt Flow will be arriving tomorrow or Wednesday as the hysteroscopy is scheduled for October 3rd. Leslie is out of town for work so our best friend Val will be taking me to the appointment and caring for me after. She is on strict instructions to sneak an M&M McFlurry into the hospital for me :).
We have three frozen girl embryos. Two A+ and one A. I met with our fertility doctor regarding her plan should we proceed with a second frozen embryo transfer. She wants to perform a hysteroscopy which under her protocol requires an overnight hospital stay. A hysteroscopy is the process of using a viewing scope to examine the interior of the uterus along with the cervical canal. The scope is inserted through the vagina and into the cervical opening--I will be out during this process. She wants to see if I have any scar tissue issues and also wants to biopsy some of the lining. This test has to occur between days 5 and 12 of my next period. She wanted me to go on birth control pills. I hesitated and she withdrew that requirement immediately. So we have my pre-op appointment tomorrow. Hopefully Aunt Flow will be arriving tomorrow or Wednesday as the hysteroscopy is scheduled for October 3rd. Leslie is out of town for work so our best friend Val will be taking me to the appointment and caring for me after. She is on strict instructions to sneak an M&M McFlurry into the hospital for me :).
Round II-Two week wait again
We really tried to be disciplined this go around. The day of the transfer we went shopping and found a VHS version of Look Who's Talking for our viewing pleasure that night. I had an acupuncture appointment that afternoon which went fine. I went for a walk after work each day, followed our meal plan to a T, performed the meditation exercises daily, and Leslie blended pineapple cores which are thought to increase the chance of implantation.
Symptoms this time around were similar to the last go around. Leslie has become a champ at administering the progesterone shots so they do not even hurt anymore. I was peeing every hour---that's what you get for drinking 90 ounces + of water each day. I was burping approximately five days after transfer. Around seven days of transfer I noticed my veins all over my body were very blue. It was pretty dramatic.
We did not POAS---it just caused too much stress the last go around and this time we were going to just wait. In addition, I was given strict orders from Leslie that I was not allowed to go to any 2WW blogs. I had a three day trial starting day 9 following the transfer. The last day of trial was our blood test day. I had Court right at 8:00am and the doctor's office is 30 minutes away. My appointment was at 7:30 but I got to the office at 7am and the nurse was there and took my blood sample right away---THANK YOU! We scheduled the call at 12:30pm.
On my drive to Court I was feeling nauseous---great, that has to be a sign!
I finished my morning hearing, my alarm went off at 12pm (pre-approved by the Judge) for my second estrogen pill of the day (it was impossible for me to remember the four pills without having the phone alarms). We took the lunch break and I immediately went to the hall to wait for the call. I turned on my phone and noticed I had a voicemail already. I listened to the voicemail and it was the doctor apologizing that the test was negative. I was devastated. I went to a corner of the courthouse where no one was around and just cried and cried. I called Leslie to deliver the bad news and she too was devastated; we really thought we were pregnant this time. We both had to pull it together as we had full afternoons. On my way to the Courthouse cafeteria I ran into my mentor who noticed something was wrong. I filled her in and vented the frustrations of the process. I pulled it together and rocked the rest of my trial. Bonus--it was Friday.
After work we ordered everything on the menu at Glass Nickel Pizza---well almost, we ordered pizza, a breadstick appetizer, alfredo pasta, and two cookies for dessert. We paired our eloquent dining experience with red wine. We ordered two red box movies and decided to have a veg-out evening. I cannot imagine going through this process with anyone else. Leslie is my rock. Despite the depressing news of the day, our love for the other and determination to grow as a family is still going strong. We decided to take a month off from the process and get a second opinion from another fertility doctor in the area to make sure we are on track.
The following Monday I received a lovely card from my mentor:
"Ladies,
As I learned last week from "The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel,": "It will turn out right in the end, and if it is not right, it's not the end!"
Keep the faith!
Love,
Pat"
Symptoms this time around were similar to the last go around. Leslie has become a champ at administering the progesterone shots so they do not even hurt anymore. I was peeing every hour---that's what you get for drinking 90 ounces + of water each day. I was burping approximately five days after transfer. Around seven days of transfer I noticed my veins all over my body were very blue. It was pretty dramatic.
We did not POAS---it just caused too much stress the last go around and this time we were going to just wait. In addition, I was given strict orders from Leslie that I was not allowed to go to any 2WW blogs. I had a three day trial starting day 9 following the transfer. The last day of trial was our blood test day. I had Court right at 8:00am and the doctor's office is 30 minutes away. My appointment was at 7:30 but I got to the office at 7am and the nurse was there and took my blood sample right away---THANK YOU! We scheduled the call at 12:30pm.
On my drive to Court I was feeling nauseous---great, that has to be a sign!
I finished my morning hearing, my alarm went off at 12pm (pre-approved by the Judge) for my second estrogen pill of the day (it was impossible for me to remember the four pills without having the phone alarms). We took the lunch break and I immediately went to the hall to wait for the call. I turned on my phone and noticed I had a voicemail already. I listened to the voicemail and it was the doctor apologizing that the test was negative. I was devastated. I went to a corner of the courthouse where no one was around and just cried and cried. I called Leslie to deliver the bad news and she too was devastated; we really thought we were pregnant this time. We both had to pull it together as we had full afternoons. On my way to the Courthouse cafeteria I ran into my mentor who noticed something was wrong. I filled her in and vented the frustrations of the process. I pulled it together and rocked the rest of my trial. Bonus--it was Friday.
After work we ordered everything on the menu at Glass Nickel Pizza---well almost, we ordered pizza, a breadstick appetizer, alfredo pasta, and two cookies for dessert. We paired our eloquent dining experience with red wine. We ordered two red box movies and decided to have a veg-out evening. I cannot imagine going through this process with anyone else. Leslie is my rock. Despite the depressing news of the day, our love for the other and determination to grow as a family is still going strong. We decided to take a month off from the process and get a second opinion from another fertility doctor in the area to make sure we are on track.
The following Monday I received a lovely card from my mentor:
"Ladies,
As I learned last week from "The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel,": "It will turn out right in the end, and if it is not right, it's not the end!"
Keep the faith!
Love,
Pat"
Round 2-Frozen Embryo Transfer
It's been a while since the last post; time to play a little catch up. After stopping the estrogen and the progesterone, Aunt Flow followed in less than a week. We called the doctors office the day of my period to find out whether we were starting the protocol right away or waiting a month. The coordinator wanted me to come in for an appointment but we were still on vacation. So we got the doctor on the phone to find out what we should do. The instructions were to start back up on the four estrogen pills and two patches per day and to come in for an appointment when we returned. We were skipping the lupron this time as she was afraid that the lupron was negatively impacting my lining (a little frustrated to find this out after the fact that my lining was at issue). Our appointment was for a week later and our lining was looking "excellent." In fact, she said that my lining looked amazing compared to the last round-the right thickness and the triple layering. So we were instructed to start the progesterone shots right away again and our implantation would be scheduled five days later.
We decided to incorporate acupuncture this time around. Acupuncture is also not covered by insurance, but at this point, what's another couple hundred dollars. The acupuncturist said that my liver is congested (probably doesn't help that it is processing all of these meds). So I drank lemon water in the morning and she gave me a conflicting list of foods I should eat---rice okay but no carbs--huh? So instead I stuck with the Leslie approved meal plan for this round: 3-32 oz water throughout the day, 8 oz. of green machine in the morning, two scrambled eggs and one piece of toast, peanut butter and jelly as an early afternoon meal, spinach and apple salad in the middle of the afternoon, low sodium V8 late after noon, and whatever for dinner which included rice and a protein. I also incorporated the meditation exercises recommended by the acupuncturist and I did those three times a day every day.
The day of the transfer the acupuncturist met us at the doctor's office and we did one session before the transfer. Our two A+ male embryos made it through the thaw and were ready to go. The doctor wheeled us into the transfer room and began the transfer without the other doctor (a little worried about that but she said it was perfect). She said the lining was perfect, the transfer was perfect so she expected great news in 11 days for our follow up appointment.
We decided to incorporate acupuncture this time around. Acupuncture is also not covered by insurance, but at this point, what's another couple hundred dollars. The acupuncturist said that my liver is congested (probably doesn't help that it is processing all of these meds). So I drank lemon water in the morning and she gave me a conflicting list of foods I should eat---rice okay but no carbs--huh? So instead I stuck with the Leslie approved meal plan for this round: 3-32 oz water throughout the day, 8 oz. of green machine in the morning, two scrambled eggs and one piece of toast, peanut butter and jelly as an early afternoon meal, spinach and apple salad in the middle of the afternoon, low sodium V8 late after noon, and whatever for dinner which included rice and a protein. I also incorporated the meditation exercises recommended by the acupuncturist and I did those three times a day every day.
The day of the transfer the acupuncturist met us at the doctor's office and we did one session before the transfer. Our two A+ male embryos made it through the thaw and were ready to go. The doctor wheeled us into the transfer room and began the transfer without the other doctor (a little worried about that but she said it was perfect). She said the lining was perfect, the transfer was perfect so she expected great news in 11 days for our follow up appointment.
Thursday, July 19, 2012
2WW Part II
Day 7: Well we are 7dp5dt and another negative this morning. Still trying to stay positive but I am feeling very discouraged today. I had to call in our extra prescriptions for our vacation-I will need more vivelle patches and estrogen pills. I warn the Walgreens person over the phone that it will require an additional authorization and explain I will be on vacation. He says it will be no problem and says that I can pick up the prescriptions at 5pm. I went to pick them up at 5pm and the guy I spoke to forgot to make the call and my insurance company is closed now. We leave for vacation tomorrow so it will be tight but they promise to make the call first thing in the morning. I started to tear up in the pharmacy drive thru (what is wrong with me??) and call my mom on the way home. I started crying and my mom was able to calm me down. She says to stay calm and think of how great it will be to learn we are pregnant in Niagara Falls. Leslie is at a work dinner that night so I am on my own. I make myself a Jack's Pizza and end up having heartburn all night. I never have heartburn--is it a sign???
Day 8: 8dp5dt-poas and it's negative. I am frantically searching the 2WW websites for hope and found just a couple. I call the nurse at the fertility clinic and explain the only symptoms I have had have been burping and heartburn and that I have used HPTs and they are all negative. She tells me to step away from the stick and just stay positive as she frequently sees positive betas when people POAS during the 2WW. She even described a recent situation where one of the patients stopped taking her meds because she thought it was negative and it turned out she was positive but then there were issues with the discontinued meds. We start vacation today and are feeling positive. First night of vacation and we normally have sex every day of vacation (TMI I know) and there are no restrictions on by my doctor so I think hey, maybe we need a little shake up in there. All was great. I decide not to POAS before the Beta which will be in Niagara Falls.
Day 9: NO POAS, we drive from our stop in Michigan, through Canada to the Niagara Falls. We were listening to the radio and heard of a guy who was detained in Seattle for several hours after trying to bring candy from Canada back in the US. So of course-Leslie needs that candy. We find it at a gas station. It is illegal in the US because the toys inside of the chocolate egg are a choking hazard. Leslie did not choke on the candy. We arrive in Niagara Falls and have AMAZING NY style pizza that night.
Day 10: We have our blood test at 7:10am at a local blood test facility in Niagara Falls. We go back to the hotel room and take a nap before we get on our bikes and bike to the Falls. They are absolutely gorgeous. We call the doctor’s office to see if they have the results before we go on our Maid of the Mist tour and they haven’t received anything yet. So we go on our tour---fun and wet. Great views, the Canadian side falls are even better than the US falls. We get back to the dock and walk up the stairs to get an up close view of the US falls. While up there we see we have a voicemail and listen---BFN from our fertility doctor. We are certainly devastated but we pull ourselves together and head back to the hotel. We call the clinic when we get there and discuss our plan. We do not want to rush this so we want to make sure the next round is right. We have 5 frozen eggs (3 girls and 2 boys) and the doctor is confident that there is a pregnancy in our future. She believes there may have been some issues with my use of Lupron so she isn’t going to use the drug this go around. I am supposed to call day 2 of my next period to go in for an ultrasound. We decide to go back to our amazing pizza place (still great) and I have a glass of wine. After 4 months of no drinking---whoo that really hit me. We found a Ben & Jerry’s for Leslie and head back to the hotel for an early turn in. We agree that we want to make this next round as calm as positive. We talk about plans including ways to make the next 2WW more manageable. Decision---we will not POAS the next go around.
Sunday, July 15, 2012
2WW Part I
Day 1: Yesterday was nice and calm. After the transfer, we went to Chipotle for lunch, then we went to the bank as we needed to get cash for our upcoming vacation, then we went to the zoo to check out the animals. I was still feeling the effects of the valium so I was calm and up for anything. We went home after the zoo and I made dinner while Leslie caught up on some work. We watched a little tv and turned in early.
We both went to work today and around noon I received the call regarding the number of eggs that were frozen. Of the two that were questionable (one boy and one girl) the girl did not make it to A so we have five frozen---three girls and two boys.
I really have no symptoms that would tell me I'm pregnant. I am feeling bloated but that is probably due to the progesterone shots.
Day 2: I am very aware of every little movement in my body. I have been on the 2WW forums and I keep wondering---am I feeling cramping? But then I think it was just gas. I have been burping quite a bit and am peeing more frequently. But on the other hand, I am drinking more water so no identified symptoms.
Day 3: I had what I thought was cramping in the middle of the night that woke me up (but could have been gas). I drank some water as I have been really thirsty and don't want to get dehydrated.
Day 4: Last day of the work week----good thing and bad thing. We went to a Mallards game tonight just ourselves. No additional symptoms---still bloated and still burping :). My boobs are certainly bigger from when we started but that kicked in with the first round of pills/shots so again, this could be the progesterone and estrogen I am taking.
Day 5: I was up in the middle of the night/or early in the morning (4:30am) to pee and Leslie and I decide to POAS for the first time. We wait the full three minutes as we promise ourselves we are not going to be bummed if it comes back negative because it is still early. BFN. We go back to sleep for a few hours and I was up around 9am and am back to my 2WW forums to confirm that others who ended with positives had BFNs at this time. I am also checking on symptoms but the challenge is that most IVF reporters are women who had a retrieval and then an implantation just days later so some of their symptoms could have been from the retrieval. I am comforted to see that many do not have any symptoms at all. We decide we are going to wait until Monday to POAS again.
We went downtown for artfair on the square and went to the Madison Cougars football game that night which was great to keep our mind off things. I made chicken thighs for dinner but neither of us was really hungry. The smell of the chicken was kind of grossing me out when we got back to the car which Leslie thought may be a sign but it could have been that we were hot all day with no desire to eat. Peeing every hour but I'm drinking water every hour it seems so again no symptoms.
Morning of Day 6: Well I was up again at 4:30 to pee, decided to go back to sleep and leave the stick alone. I only take a sip of water and go back to bed. But then I woke up again at 8:00am. My pee has been pretty clear lately from being so hydrated. I thought that maybe my pee is maybe too watered down and since I didn't drink much water at 4 and I am thirsty that maybe my pee will have traces of HCG now for the FRER to pick up something??? Leslie is asleep and had a few beers last night at the after party so I let her sleep while I POAS (I know I know we said wait til Monday but based on my calculations (I bought 6 FRER sticks) I have enough to get me to the blood test). I wait the three minutes BFN---I kept reading about the faint lines that others were getting so I am straining to see anything and there is nothing. So now I decide how to fill my day. I am thinking yard work then we are babysitting a 2 year old for a friend--back to the zoo :).
We both went to work today and around noon I received the call regarding the number of eggs that were frozen. Of the two that were questionable (one boy and one girl) the girl did not make it to A so we have five frozen---three girls and two boys.
I really have no symptoms that would tell me I'm pregnant. I am feeling bloated but that is probably due to the progesterone shots.
Day 2: I am very aware of every little movement in my body. I have been on the 2WW forums and I keep wondering---am I feeling cramping? But then I think it was just gas. I have been burping quite a bit and am peeing more frequently. But on the other hand, I am drinking more water so no identified symptoms.
Day 3: I had what I thought was cramping in the middle of the night that woke me up (but could have been gas). I drank some water as I have been really thirsty and don't want to get dehydrated.
Day 4: Last day of the work week----good thing and bad thing. We went to a Mallards game tonight just ourselves. No additional symptoms---still bloated and still burping :). My boobs are certainly bigger from when we started but that kicked in with the first round of pills/shots so again, this could be the progesterone and estrogen I am taking.
Day 5: I was up in the middle of the night/or early in the morning (4:30am) to pee and Leslie and I decide to POAS for the first time. We wait the full three minutes as we promise ourselves we are not going to be bummed if it comes back negative because it is still early. BFN. We go back to sleep for a few hours and I was up around 9am and am back to my 2WW forums to confirm that others who ended with positives had BFNs at this time. I am also checking on symptoms but the challenge is that most IVF reporters are women who had a retrieval and then an implantation just days later so some of their symptoms could have been from the retrieval. I am comforted to see that many do not have any symptoms at all. We decide we are going to wait until Monday to POAS again.
We went downtown for artfair on the square and went to the Madison Cougars football game that night which was great to keep our mind off things. I made chicken thighs for dinner but neither of us was really hungry. The smell of the chicken was kind of grossing me out when we got back to the car which Leslie thought may be a sign but it could have been that we were hot all day with no desire to eat. Peeing every hour but I'm drinking water every hour it seems so again no symptoms.
Morning of Day 6: Well I was up again at 4:30 to pee, decided to go back to sleep and leave the stick alone. I only take a sip of water and go back to bed. But then I woke up again at 8:00am. My pee has been pretty clear lately from being so hydrated. I thought that maybe my pee is maybe too watered down and since I didn't drink much water at 4 and I am thirsty that maybe my pee will have traces of HCG now for the FRER to pick up something??? Leslie is asleep and had a few beers last night at the after party so I let her sleep while I POAS (I know I know we said wait til Monday but based on my calculations (I bought 6 FRER sticks) I have enough to get me to the blood test). I wait the three minutes BFN---I kept reading about the faint lines that others were getting so I am straining to see anything and there is nothing. So now I decide how to fill my day. I am thinking yard work then we are babysitting a 2 year old for a friend--back to the zoo :).
Egg Details and Transfer
Day 0-26 eggs retrieved from Leslie.
Day 1-26 eggs made it through the night, all 26 were fertilized.
Day 2-23 eggs are continuing to grow after fertilization. Of those eggs we know that 18 are received a Grade 1! We are super excited and hopeful!
Day 3- We now have 24 eggs that are continuing to grow---they must have missed one yesterday. Of those, 18 are receiving a Grade 1 but all are of a quality that would proceed to the genetic testing so a biopsy will be performed to test for X, Y and 21.
Day 4-We do not have the genetic testing results back but the fertility doctor explained that this is when we see a severe drop in egg quantity. We have 16 eggs remaining that are now in the morula phase. Divide Divide Divide! We are scheduled to be at the doctor's office tomorrow at 11:30am with a transfer at 12:30am.
Day 5-I take Leslie to work and head off to work myself. I have to go to the appointment with a full bladder and my valium in hand. Since the appointment isn't until 11:30am, I go to the bathroom right away when I wake up and decide I will hold it from then on until the appointment. I wasn't planning on going into work but was actually able to get a lot done and am glad I went in to keep my mind off of the appointment. Leslie and I drove to the appointment together and we are trying to stay maintain positive thoughts and are eager to hear what the results of the genetic testing were.
When we arrive, I am instructed to undress from the neck down---I do not generally wear clothes above my neck :). We have to wait a 1/2 hour or so for the doctor to get the results so in the meantime, I am playing classic bubbles on my phone (I am so addicted to this game). Leslie is checking work in.
The fertility doctor comes in to reveal the report and she is all smiles. First she explains the results from the genetic testing. Of the 24 that were sent, a significant portion were marked as abnormal. We are down to 8 eggs. We have three girl blasts-all of which are hatched! Our doctor said that she that she only sees hatched three times a year so she is very encouraged. We have one girl and one boy blast that has not hatched and would be in the B range. If they make it to hatched by tomorrow then they will be frozen. And we have three boy blasts that are hatched! Our doctor will pick the two best boys to implant. We decided to name them Willy (the Wildcat from Northwestern) and Bucky (the Badger from Wisconsin) and away they went.
I took the valium and we had to wait about 45 minutes for that to kick in and for the doctors to be scrubbed in. I was wheeled into the waiting room and I have to say I was feeling preeettttyy good. I was very chill from the valium. Leslie was asking a ton of questions and I didn't have any care in teh world. Leslie was in the room with me in the transfer and while one doctor was performing the ultrasound, my regular doctor was doing the implantation. The procedure lasted a whole minute but then we have to sit there for 30 minutes. The problem is---I still have that full bladder. So the doctor used a catheter to empty. We left with a photo of Bucky and Willie and a sonogram photo of the implanted eggs.
We left with the instruction to do things that make us happy. Limited to light exercise and no sex for the day but we can go back to normal the next day. I had read online from forums and other IVF clinic websites that many women are ordered on bed rest on the day of transfer and others that say no sex for the first trimester! When I questioned our doctor, she explained that studies show that women do better when they are not on bed rest---mostly because you just have time to sit there and worry whether you are pregnant. She also said there were no quality studies on the issue of sex.
NOW WE ENTER THE DREADED TWO WEEK WAIT.
Day 1-26 eggs made it through the night, all 26 were fertilized.
Day 2-23 eggs are continuing to grow after fertilization. Of those eggs we know that 18 are received a Grade 1! We are super excited and hopeful!
Day 3- We now have 24 eggs that are continuing to grow---they must have missed one yesterday. Of those, 18 are receiving a Grade 1 but all are of a quality that would proceed to the genetic testing so a biopsy will be performed to test for X, Y and 21.
Day 4-We do not have the genetic testing results back but the fertility doctor explained that this is when we see a severe drop in egg quantity. We have 16 eggs remaining that are now in the morula phase. Divide Divide Divide! We are scheduled to be at the doctor's office tomorrow at 11:30am with a transfer at 12:30am.
Day 5-I take Leslie to work and head off to work myself. I have to go to the appointment with a full bladder and my valium in hand. Since the appointment isn't until 11:30am, I go to the bathroom right away when I wake up and decide I will hold it from then on until the appointment. I wasn't planning on going into work but was actually able to get a lot done and am glad I went in to keep my mind off of the appointment. Leslie and I drove to the appointment together and we are trying to stay maintain positive thoughts and are eager to hear what the results of the genetic testing were.
When we arrive, I am instructed to undress from the neck down---I do not generally wear clothes above my neck :). We have to wait a 1/2 hour or so for the doctor to get the results so in the meantime, I am playing classic bubbles on my phone (I am so addicted to this game). Leslie is checking work in.
The fertility doctor comes in to reveal the report and she is all smiles. First she explains the results from the genetic testing. Of the 24 that were sent, a significant portion were marked as abnormal. We are down to 8 eggs. We have three girl blasts-all of which are hatched! Our doctor said that she that she only sees hatched three times a year so she is very encouraged. We have one girl and one boy blast that has not hatched and would be in the B range. If they make it to hatched by tomorrow then they will be frozen. And we have three boy blasts that are hatched! Our doctor will pick the two best boys to implant. We decided to name them Willy (the Wildcat from Northwestern) and Bucky (the Badger from Wisconsin) and away they went.
I took the valium and we had to wait about 45 minutes for that to kick in and for the doctors to be scrubbed in. I was wheeled into the waiting room and I have to say I was feeling preeettttyy good. I was very chill from the valium. Leslie was asking a ton of questions and I didn't have any care in teh world. Leslie was in the room with me in the transfer and while one doctor was performing the ultrasound, my regular doctor was doing the implantation. The procedure lasted a whole minute but then we have to sit there for 30 minutes. The problem is---I still have that full bladder. So the doctor used a catheter to empty. We left with a photo of Bucky and Willie and a sonogram photo of the implanted eggs.
We left with the instruction to do things that make us happy. Limited to light exercise and no sex for the day but we can go back to normal the next day. I had read online from forums and other IVF clinic websites that many women are ordered on bed rest on the day of transfer and others that say no sex for the first trimester! When I questioned our doctor, she explained that studies show that women do better when they are not on bed rest---mostly because you just have time to sit there and worry whether you are pregnant. She also said there were no quality studies on the issue of sex.
NOW WE ENTER THE DREADED TWO WEEK WAIT.
Thursday, July 5, 2012
Fertilized Eggs
We are day 1 post retrieval. The doctors office called me with the number of eggs they were able to fertilize. So I called Leslie and played guess the number....8? higher 10? higher 15? higher ("oh boy oh boy") 18? higher 20? higher ("haha really?") 23? Exactly. We are both super excited.
Tomorrow we learn the quality of the eggs and then we make the decision of whether we want to go through with the gender testing. We are both smiles the rest of the day :)
Tomorrow we learn the quality of the eggs and then we make the decision of whether we want to go through with the gender testing. We are both smiles the rest of the day :)
Egg retrieval
We had the retrieval yesterday which went well. Leslie was thoroughly enjoying the sedatives and decided to tell the doctor "all of her secrets"----that would have been a hoot to be in the operating room during that procedure.
I was in the recovery room waiting---I had my fancy zip up overalls, hair net, and shoe covers. It was really hot in the room (because it was 105 degrees outside) so it felt like forever as I was waiting for the nurse to wheel Leslie back. The receptionist came to keep me company a few times as the procedure went longer than expected. But for good reason----we had 26 EGGS!!!! So excited. Today is day 0 so tomorrow they will call with the number they were able to fertilize.
Leslie is recovering well. The nurse was demonstrating the progesterone shot for her (after she regained full memory skills) and she turned green. She vomited twice on the way home--likely due to the maneuvers I had to make in my quest to find her food on the fourth of July. We stayed in that day to rest and watched Lost on Netflix and played Settlers of Catan with our friend Val. Now we wait as our eggs grow :).
I was in the recovery room waiting---I had my fancy zip up overalls, hair net, and shoe covers. It was really hot in the room (because it was 105 degrees outside) so it felt like forever as I was waiting for the nurse to wheel Leslie back. The receptionist came to keep me company a few times as the procedure went longer than expected. But for good reason----we had 26 EGGS!!!! So excited. Today is day 0 so tomorrow they will call with the number they were able to fertilize.
Leslie is recovering well. The nurse was demonstrating the progesterone shot for her (after she regained full memory skills) and she turned green. She vomited twice on the way home--likely due to the maneuvers I had to make in my quest to find her food on the fourth of July. We stayed in that day to rest and watched Lost on Netflix and played Settlers of Catan with our friend Val. Now we wait as our eggs grow :).
Leslie's First Post
It's the night before egg retrieval. Lucky us, timing worked out so that
they are retrieving on the 4th of July. So our plans to attend a MLB
game are out the window... oh well.
I've been taking follestim since last Friday (11 days ago) to stimulate my ovaries. And for past 5 days, I've taken Ganarelix to keep my ovaries from ovulating and losing all the eggs. that means that i've gotten 2 shots a day for 5 days.
The themselves shots are not too bad, but every once-in-a-while we will hit a capillary and it will bleed. This is almost always followed by a nice little bruise on my stomach for a few days.
We've had to go in for an ultrasound every 3 days. They've counted the sacks each day and we're predicting that tomorrow we'll get a good number of eggs (30+). We know that this number is much higher than the number of fertilized eggs that make it to day 5, but we are still excited.
last night at 10 pm, we did a trigger shot of 40units of Lupron.
Since today's the last day before egg retrieval, it seems fitting for me to now complain about the bloating in my lower stomach. I can definitely feel my ovaries. When I am sitting down, which is most of the time, I cannot really feel them unless I think about it. It's when I am walking around that they are bothersome. It feels like I am trying to walk around while doing a crunch... but it's not my abs, it's lower.
The worst feeling (which I would actually qualify as "pain") was from riding my motorcycle. It's been pretty hot here, so the pavement has been buckling a little. Every little bump completely jars my insides and is mightily un-enjoyable.
What is really neat about this time in our process is that my wife, Erica, has taken to talking to my belly as if I were pregnant. I really like this and it's neat to think I'm growing 1/2 of our future children, inside of me right now.
I'm excited for tomorrow. It's been 3 months since I've had caffeine or a substantial amount of alcohol. While I'm not going to go hogs-wild tomorrow, I am looking forward to feeling more awake at work and to a beer or two.
I've been taking follestim since last Friday (11 days ago) to stimulate my ovaries. And for past 5 days, I've taken Ganarelix to keep my ovaries from ovulating and losing all the eggs. that means that i've gotten 2 shots a day for 5 days.
The themselves shots are not too bad, but every once-in-a-while we will hit a capillary and it will bleed. This is almost always followed by a nice little bruise on my stomach for a few days.
We've had to go in for an ultrasound every 3 days. They've counted the sacks each day and we're predicting that tomorrow we'll get a good number of eggs (30+). We know that this number is much higher than the number of fertilized eggs that make it to day 5, but we are still excited.
last night at 10 pm, we did a trigger shot of 40units of Lupron.
Since today's the last day before egg retrieval, it seems fitting for me to now complain about the bloating in my lower stomach. I can definitely feel my ovaries. When I am sitting down, which is most of the time, I cannot really feel them unless I think about it. It's when I am walking around that they are bothersome. It feels like I am trying to walk around while doing a crunch... but it's not my abs, it's lower.
The worst feeling (which I would actually qualify as "pain") was from riding my motorcycle. It's been pretty hot here, so the pavement has been buckling a little. Every little bump completely jars my insides and is mightily un-enjoyable.
What is really neat about this time in our process is that my wife, Erica, has taken to talking to my belly as if I were pregnant. I really like this and it's neat to think I'm growing 1/2 of our future children, inside of me right now.
I'm excited for tomorrow. It's been 3 months since I've had caffeine or a substantial amount of alcohol. While I'm not going to go hogs-wild tomorrow, I am looking forward to feeling more awake at work and to a beer or two.
Saturday, June 23, 2012
Time to start growing some eggs!
So we had our third ultrasound yesterday and my lining is good to go.
So I will continue the estrogen patches, four estrogen pills per day,
lupron, baby aspirin and the prenatal vitamins. And now Leslie is to
start growing some eggs. The doctor had her stop her birth control pill
after last Wednesday and she actually started her period on Wednesday.
The doctor explained this was normal and expected in fact. We had an
estrogen test and an ultrasound and Leslie is good to go. I could
actually see the potential babies (eggs) and the doctor was very
pleased. Next step-follistim. Payback time :).
Follistim is referred to as liquid gold for good reason---it was over two grand for the medication. It came with a carrying case---nice touch but I would have rather they just took the fifteen bucks off the price. I read the instructions for the follistim twice before Leslie came home. I had the follistim stored in the fridge so I took the vial out to thaw as the injection is more painful when the medication is cold. When Leslie came home she was nervous for her first shot. I think I took the "dart like motion" instruction a little too serious as her eyes really wound up when I was going in for the puncture. There was a little bleeding at the site but it wasn't painful. Our next doctor appointment is on Monday.
Follistim is referred to as liquid gold for good reason---it was over two grand for the medication. It came with a carrying case---nice touch but I would have rather they just took the fifteen bucks off the price. I read the instructions for the follistim twice before Leslie came home. I had the follistim stored in the fridge so I took the vial out to thaw as the injection is more painful when the medication is cold. When Leslie came home she was nervous for her first shot. I think I took the "dart like motion" instruction a little too serious as her eyes really wound up when I was going in for the puncture. There was a little bleeding at the site but it wasn't painful. Our next doctor appointment is on Monday.
Giving myself a shot
Leslie had to leave for work early one morning and I decided to sleep in. When I woke up I thought, hey, how hard could it be, I'll just give myself my lupron. So I prepped the needle and applied the alcohol pad to my stomach and I was ready to go except I could not give myself the shot. I was coaching myself outloud and even tried three attempts but I could not do it. Twenty minutes later and I realized I needed to get ready for work. I tried Leslie's phone to see how far away she was and was even planning my backup plan to call our friend Val to come over and administer the shot. Luckily Leslie wasn't far so she turned around and came home to administer the shot. Even if it was a pain for her, I know she was super happy to know that I needed her to give me the shot. She likes to feel needed :).
Sunday, June 17, 2012
Need more time to build the uterine lining
So I have been on Lupron for approximately three weeks now and estrogen and baby aspirin for approximately two weeks. We had our follow up ultrasound to check the uterine lining and I was just shy of the "seven" target that my doctor was looking for. I had the three layers but she wants to see my uterine lining above seven before Leslie starts to grow eggs.
We were very close so it was a judgment call, however, with how much we are paying we do not want to rush the process. We have been keeping track of the expenses thus far for doctors appointments, sperm (don't forget about the shipping and freezing costs), and medications and we are now over $20,000 in. Here's to hoping that we are successful with our first IVF. In the meantime, we have Leslie's follistim in the fridge ready and waiting for my uterine lining.
I do not have far to go so the doctor increased my estrogen to four pills per day (from three) and prescribed two estrogen patches that I change every three days. I was experiencing hot flashes and I developed a rash when I first started taking the estrogen. In addition, I was pretty short fused after taking it about a week. So Leslie was less than pleased with the thought of an increased dose of estrogen with a presumably increased level of side effects. After two days I am starting to have headaches and the hot flashes are more prominent. But hey, hopefully this means my uterine lining is growing and at our next appointment (Friday) we will hear that we can start growing eggs :).
We were very close so it was a judgment call, however, with how much we are paying we do not want to rush the process. We have been keeping track of the expenses thus far for doctors appointments, sperm (don't forget about the shipping and freezing costs), and medications and we are now over $20,000 in. Here's to hoping that we are successful with our first IVF. In the meantime, we have Leslie's follistim in the fridge ready and waiting for my uterine lining.
I do not have far to go so the doctor increased my estrogen to four pills per day (from three) and prescribed two estrogen patches that I change every three days. I was experiencing hot flashes and I developed a rash when I first started taking the estrogen. In addition, I was pretty short fused after taking it about a week. So Leslie was less than pleased with the thought of an increased dose of estrogen with a presumably increased level of side effects. After two days I am starting to have headaches and the hot flashes are more prominent. But hey, hopefully this means my uterine lining is growing and at our next appointment (Friday) we will hear that we can start growing eggs :).
Saturday, June 9, 2012
Getting up to speed
Leslie and I have been married for almost two years and are still madly in love. I am 29 and Leslie just turned 28. When we first decided we were ready to become parents, we had lots to consider. We decided that we wanted to try to conceive a child through reciprocal ivf where we will use Leslie's eggs and I will be the carrier.
We had our first appointment with the fertility doctor in November of 2011. We identified what our plans were (at the time it was to begin the process one year from the date of this appointment). She went through the process with us and then started in our medical histories. I had just had my Mirena IUD removed just two months prior and was expecting regular periods (though it had been years since I had regular periods---I absolutely LOVED my Mirena). I was taking wellbutrin (anti-depressant) and ambien which we learned I would need to kick prior to starting the process. Leslie did not have regular periods and was on medication for hypothyroidism. Her doctors were still investigating why she wasn't experiencing regular periods and the fertility doctor retorted immediately-"well you have PCOS." We found it odd that this doctor who hadn't performed any physical examination could just through out a diagnosis but we took the diagnosis to her primary care physicians and it was later confirmed that she does have PCOS-polycystic ovary syndrome. The fertility doctor assured us that she has experience working with patients who have PCOS but cautioned that she will need to monitor Leslie very closely during the egg growing phase as the procedure does have the potential to be life threatening. We left the appointment knowing that we really didn't have to start the process until September of 2012; we had one more year to do whatever we wanted.
After three months of "doing whatever we wanted" we realized we didn't know what we were waiting for. So in February I kicked the wellbutrin and the ambien. I stopped taking them during a week long relaxing vacation which was a great opportunity for me as I didn't have the stresses of work to deal with. In March of 2012 we emailed the fertility doctor and indicated we were going to start the process. First step: no more caffeine or alcohol. We had one last hoorah on St. Patrick's Day and consumed a sufficient amount of green beer and jameson such that we had no desire to drink for weeks later. The caffeine was another story. Leslie and I both drink caffeine every morning at work; I drink black tea and Leslie drinks coffee. But ultimately after three days of headaches, we had kicked the last of our vices.
Next we had to make an appointment with our primary care physician to complete all of the bloodwork that the fertility clinic needed. We went through the primary care physician to see if we could get the tests covered by insurance. My tests came back as hoped. Leslie's tests came back and we had to have a meeting with the fertility doctor to discuss the results. The bloodwork confirmed that Leslie definitely has PCOS and that she is pre-pre-diabetic. Leslie was already taking 1000mg of metformin and the fertility doctor upped it to 2000mg. In addition, she gave the directive that Leslie had to drop weight immediately. When we first met with the fertility doctor, Leslie was a solid 198lbs. Leslie and I had just completed our fourth season of playing women's professional tackle football and Leslie was the star running back and middle linebacker. So Leslie started a low carb diet and after a month or so had already dropped the ten pounds the doctor was requesting (2 1/2 months later and she's still going strong (another ten pounds down)---so proud of her!).
In April of 2012, we selected our sperm donor. I am 1/2 puerto rican and we wanted to find a hispanic donor. We were looking for someone tall, smart, handsome, and well educated. We decided to go through the California Cryobank. We selected Don Or and had the goods shipped to our fertility clinic for frozen keeping while we prepared our bodies.
In May of 2012 we had all of our ducks in a row. We were waiting for my period to start as normal and on May 15th it did---I have never been so happy to get my period, I was actually giddy in the bathroom stall. So I started my birthcontrol pills right away and scheduled my sonohysterogram for May 24, 2012. In the meantime, the fertility clinic ordered the medications I will need in the process, including all of the needles (yikes). On the day of the sonohysterogram, Leslie and I were both sitting in the examination room (well, I was sans pants). A sonohysterogram is an ultrasound procedure that can determine if there are abnormalities inside the uterus that might interfere with pregnancy. Using a speculum, a very then, soft, flexible plastic catheter will be inserted through the vagina and cervix into the lower part of the uterine cavity. The speculum is then carefully removed so as not to disturb the catheter. A vaginal ultrasound probe is then placed into the vagina. Through the catheter, a small amount of saline (sterile salt water) is injected into the uterine cavity to separate the walls. The hardest part of the procedure for me was the speculum but I would say I experienced "mild discomfort." I have a pretty high pain tolerance (after you tear your acl and then break your leg playing football, you learn the difference between hurt and injured and pain becomes relative) and the doctor was pretty surprised that I wasn't in more pain or nauseous from the procedure. My uterus looked good so we were happy.
I continued the birth control pills and I gotta say that I was not to happy to be back on those puppies. I was on Apri--I think that's a generic for the Yaz pill. I put on about 5 pounds after starting the pill and my chest definitely went up a cup size. The boobs were sore and Leslie would say that I had the symptom the doctor explained I would have---whiny.
We started lupron injections on May 29, 2012 following an exciting white water rafting trip over Memorial Day weekend with Leslie's parents. We had the injection class the week before and we decided Leslie would give me the shot every morning. The shots are in the stomach and the needle itself is just a small insulin needle. The first one we hit a capillary which caused the point of entry to bleed and also resulted in bruising. But we haven't had any issue with any of the shots after that. I hear that these are nothing compared to the progresterone shots that are to follow. I overlapped with the birth control pills for two days and then that was done. I was spotting while I was taking the lupron and had a regular period as well which the nurse explained was completely normal.
Leslie hadn't had her period since March so they prescribed her provera to start her period and on June 4th we did our happy dance when she started her period. So she started her birth control pills on June 4th and she is waiting for me to get my lining ready so that she can start growing some eggs :).
After 10 days of 10u Lupron injections, on June 7th I had my first baseline visit and the trial transfer. The procedure itself lasted about five minutes and the fertility doctor said she was optimistic of the actual transfer based on the positioning of my uterus (whatever that means). I had a blooddraw to check my estrogen levels and those also came back as expected so in addition to the Lupron, I was to start taking 2 mg of estrogen pills three times a day and one baby aspirin a day.
So now you are up to speed. I am currently taking the lupron, estrogen pills, and aspirin. I have experienced hot flashes while taking the estrogen so far but who knows if the symptoms will continue. Our next ultrasound is on June 16th and if my lining still looks great, we can expect to start Leslie's egg growing phase on June 18th. Wish us luck!
We had our first appointment with the fertility doctor in November of 2011. We identified what our plans were (at the time it was to begin the process one year from the date of this appointment). She went through the process with us and then started in our medical histories. I had just had my Mirena IUD removed just two months prior and was expecting regular periods (though it had been years since I had regular periods---I absolutely LOVED my Mirena). I was taking wellbutrin (anti-depressant) and ambien which we learned I would need to kick prior to starting the process. Leslie did not have regular periods and was on medication for hypothyroidism. Her doctors were still investigating why she wasn't experiencing regular periods and the fertility doctor retorted immediately-"well you have PCOS." We found it odd that this doctor who hadn't performed any physical examination could just through out a diagnosis but we took the diagnosis to her primary care physicians and it was later confirmed that she does have PCOS-polycystic ovary syndrome. The fertility doctor assured us that she has experience working with patients who have PCOS but cautioned that she will need to monitor Leslie very closely during the egg growing phase as the procedure does have the potential to be life threatening. We left the appointment knowing that we really didn't have to start the process until September of 2012; we had one more year to do whatever we wanted.
After three months of "doing whatever we wanted" we realized we didn't know what we were waiting for. So in February I kicked the wellbutrin and the ambien. I stopped taking them during a week long relaxing vacation which was a great opportunity for me as I didn't have the stresses of work to deal with. In March of 2012 we emailed the fertility doctor and indicated we were going to start the process. First step: no more caffeine or alcohol. We had one last hoorah on St. Patrick's Day and consumed a sufficient amount of green beer and jameson such that we had no desire to drink for weeks later. The caffeine was another story. Leslie and I both drink caffeine every morning at work; I drink black tea and Leslie drinks coffee. But ultimately after three days of headaches, we had kicked the last of our vices.
Next we had to make an appointment with our primary care physician to complete all of the bloodwork that the fertility clinic needed. We went through the primary care physician to see if we could get the tests covered by insurance. My tests came back as hoped. Leslie's tests came back and we had to have a meeting with the fertility doctor to discuss the results. The bloodwork confirmed that Leslie definitely has PCOS and that she is pre-pre-diabetic. Leslie was already taking 1000mg of metformin and the fertility doctor upped it to 2000mg. In addition, she gave the directive that Leslie had to drop weight immediately. When we first met with the fertility doctor, Leslie was a solid 198lbs. Leslie and I had just completed our fourth season of playing women's professional tackle football and Leslie was the star running back and middle linebacker. So Leslie started a low carb diet and after a month or so had already dropped the ten pounds the doctor was requesting (2 1/2 months later and she's still going strong (another ten pounds down)---so proud of her!).
In April of 2012, we selected our sperm donor. I am 1/2 puerto rican and we wanted to find a hispanic donor. We were looking for someone tall, smart, handsome, and well educated. We decided to go through the California Cryobank. We selected Don Or and had the goods shipped to our fertility clinic for frozen keeping while we prepared our bodies.
In May of 2012 we had all of our ducks in a row. We were waiting for my period to start as normal and on May 15th it did---I have never been so happy to get my period, I was actually giddy in the bathroom stall. So I started my birthcontrol pills right away and scheduled my sonohysterogram for May 24, 2012. In the meantime, the fertility clinic ordered the medications I will need in the process, including all of the needles (yikes). On the day of the sonohysterogram, Leslie and I were both sitting in the examination room (well, I was sans pants). A sonohysterogram is an ultrasound procedure that can determine if there are abnormalities inside the uterus that might interfere with pregnancy. Using a speculum, a very then, soft, flexible plastic catheter will be inserted through the vagina and cervix into the lower part of the uterine cavity. The speculum is then carefully removed so as not to disturb the catheter. A vaginal ultrasound probe is then placed into the vagina. Through the catheter, a small amount of saline (sterile salt water) is injected into the uterine cavity to separate the walls. The hardest part of the procedure for me was the speculum but I would say I experienced "mild discomfort." I have a pretty high pain tolerance (after you tear your acl and then break your leg playing football, you learn the difference between hurt and injured and pain becomes relative) and the doctor was pretty surprised that I wasn't in more pain or nauseous from the procedure. My uterus looked good so we were happy.
I continued the birth control pills and I gotta say that I was not to happy to be back on those puppies. I was on Apri--I think that's a generic for the Yaz pill. I put on about 5 pounds after starting the pill and my chest definitely went up a cup size. The boobs were sore and Leslie would say that I had the symptom the doctor explained I would have---whiny.
We started lupron injections on May 29, 2012 following an exciting white water rafting trip over Memorial Day weekend with Leslie's parents. We had the injection class the week before and we decided Leslie would give me the shot every morning. The shots are in the stomach and the needle itself is just a small insulin needle. The first one we hit a capillary which caused the point of entry to bleed and also resulted in bruising. But we haven't had any issue with any of the shots after that. I hear that these are nothing compared to the progresterone shots that are to follow. I overlapped with the birth control pills for two days and then that was done. I was spotting while I was taking the lupron and had a regular period as well which the nurse explained was completely normal.
Leslie hadn't had her period since March so they prescribed her provera to start her period and on June 4th we did our happy dance when she started her period. So she started her birth control pills on June 4th and she is waiting for me to get my lining ready so that she can start growing some eggs :).
After 10 days of 10u Lupron injections, on June 7th I had my first baseline visit and the trial transfer. The procedure itself lasted about five minutes and the fertility doctor said she was optimistic of the actual transfer based on the positioning of my uterus (whatever that means). I had a blooddraw to check my estrogen levels and those also came back as expected so in addition to the Lupron, I was to start taking 2 mg of estrogen pills three times a day and one baby aspirin a day.
So now you are up to speed. I am currently taking the lupron, estrogen pills, and aspirin. I have experienced hot flashes while taking the estrogen so far but who knows if the symptoms will continue. Our next ultrasound is on June 16th and if my lining still looks great, we can expect to start Leslie's egg growing phase on June 18th. Wish us luck!
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